Young lady, you have some explaining to do....

Jesus Camille, where the hell have you been for that last week or so! You act like you suddenly got a life or met some dude. Well, jokes on you because both happened! Ok, so I always had a life, that's not new. However, the life of a single person is exhausting. Why didn't someone give me the memo about being an old lady and needing my rest? You should really all be so ashamed of yourselves. But I digress. So when I last left you I was basically about to be suffering from liver failure courtesy Mass. St. in Lawrence. In the mean time I am happy to report normal liver functions (at least that I can tell with my Web M.D.) and have resumed a life of bars and knitting. Suck it grandma's, I'd like to see all you really old ladies out there doing what I do in the heart of hardcore Wichita. Which is basically not much, but hey, I'm doing it and let it be said that I will take on any grandma at any bar at anytime. That was the guantlet folks, tell your g-ma's.
Now let's get serious and back up to last Thursday where I will begin my tale. July 8th started like anyother day, slight hangover and slightly later to work than I wanted to be. No big. Go to work, come home and get awesome. Why? Well, first of all because, hello, I can't help but be awesome and second of all I was going out to see Eclipse. (Quick side bar: I love Harry Potter more and always will, and if you are 11 years old and your name is Hannah then just know that your precious Jacob is so dumb and only an 11 yr. old would think he was cute. So, I'm pretty sure I just told your 11 yr old self what's up! 30yr old Camille:1 11yr old Hannah 0) It turned out to be the best of the series so far. I sacrficed my jacket, that over the years I have learned you do not leave the house without even in the dead of summer because movie theatres are like the arctic, for my new 11 yr old friend Hannah who does not apparently have my cold zone wisdom. And when I say 11, I mean 11 going on 30. She just gets it man. ;) Anyway, movie, quick beer and home to bed. Friday, play catch up with my Mini Me or Ashley as most people probably know her. We totally did awesome things that night without our I.Q. dropping too drastically. Whoo! Found out about another friend being preggers which is the most bestest possible thing ever. It was a very very happy surprise and if you are of the praying variety send some out for this bundle of joy. Otherwise send some positive vibes out to the universe because this one is gonna be awesome! And then Saturday poked its head into the weekend and I went to a bday party for a one yr old and that little son of a bitch knew how to party. Never wear a white shirt to a pool party for a one yr old and his almost 3 yr old sister. They know how to party. Trust me. Saturday night was downtown and bluesgrass. So far not much sleep happening and I will once again thank you to keep your minds out of the gutter. Trust me, I will let you know when to roll around in the filth. Sunday rolls along and I think to myself, "Fantastic. I've made it to my day of recliner and DVRing!" Wrong. I had to do stuff like "get my shit out of the living room and dining room" and "can you straighten up the bathroom" a solid 20 min of work on an otherwise unproductive day. Until that is.....! I ended up having a date that night. So for the first time in what I'm sure is ages, I took a shower on a Sunday AND put on a little make up to boot. We had some dinner then went and saw a little romantic movie called 'Predators'. Truth be told it was my pick. I also wanted to see 'Dispicable Me' but didn't want my date to think I was 5. Turns out he wanted to see it too. And why not! It looks so good! Uh, anyway, we then did a little bowling on Monday night, which it tuned out we both sucked at. Saw 'Inception' today GO SEE THAT MOVIE and now just kinda seeing what happens. I don't know if this fella reads my blog but I will say that for me I was honestly not expecting to meet someone so soon. He seems ligit and I have been having a good time with him so we'll see what happens. Now it is Friday night and I've had a few beers while watching 'The Bounty Hunter' with Melanie (which turned out to be much better than I thought for a "chick flick") and came home to drink some Riunite Lambruso "wine". I guess technically it is wine but I'm pretty sure it could be sold as candy as well.
This last week has been exhausting, tomorrow I will probably hate myself for staying up so late but I figured I needed to blog again before I found myself drifting back into non-blogging habits. So stay tuned and we'll see what happens next!! And tell a friend about this. Let's see if we can't get me a book/movie deal outta this. If you're gonna dream, dream big right! Don't get trapped in Limbo!

Rickshaws aren't a Free Ride

So when I last left you all I think I promised to bring back a few good stories with me from my weekend. I feel like I did a pretty decent job of that. So the break down for my weekend is as follows: Friday pick up Jessica at her place and hit the road. I had a medium sized red bull (which i didn't know existed, how did people ever get by on those little ones and how do people's hearts not explode right the fuck out of their chests when they drink a big one?) so I was all kinds of ready to get to Lawrence and dance/drink the night away. Everyother time I've been to Lawrence in the last year or two I was always seeing some hot single looking dude like left and right so I was excited about getting to put my rusty flirting skills to the test. Being single is like shopping with money when you've been broke for a long time. Suddenly there is nothing you want to waste your time on. But more on that in a minute. We get into Lawrence and get ourselves all fabulous looking before heading over to the bar where everyone is celebrating our friend's surprise bday party. The theme was 'White Trash/80's Prom'. I did not partake in the dressing up since I only knew a handful of people. Anyway, I wore some really bitchn' heels that I did not fall down in and the night was awesome. I did two tequila shots some how and something that had buttershots in it plus beers and still remember the night minus Jessica riding the rickshaw. Oh, what's that? A rickshaw you ask? But, Camille I thought you were in Lawrence, the home town of the amazing Jayhawks located in the central part of the U.S. in the state of Kansas. Well, yeah, I was, just give me a minute to finish before you and all your thoughts interupt me. So as I was saying, there I was at the end of the night all hungry and drunk and surrounded by other hungry and even drunker people (we got to the party late or I would have been a "drunker" also) when all of a sudden a beatiful man named Ben pulls up on his bike with a little buggy thing attached to it asking if I needed a ride. He had no idea how badly I needed a ride. Get your mind out of the gutter, remember those bitchn' heels I mentioned earlier? Yeah, well now they were more like, 'Son of a bitch!'. I needed pizza like for reals and this crazy stupid good looking Ben with the best quads/whatever the muscle behind your calf is, came and picked me up. Remember the previous blog where I joked about "whoring it up", well apon meeting this guy that became less of a joke and more of a mission statement for the night. Alas, fate had other plans for us, such as him working till way past my bedtime getting other drunk people home. Stupid fate. But again you say, 'wait Camille, wasn't that only Friday night? what about whoring it up on Saturday?' Good question. Sort of. If you were paying attention though you would know that most likely I was too hungover Saturday afternoon to do anything more then nap and be very hateful to every single person on the road for the brief amount of time I was on it before said nap. After naptime it was get pretty time and head to KC for THE most ackward wedding reception ever. I wasn't technically invited to the event but even for those that were invited it was super weird. By the time we made it back to Lawrence guess who was working till past my bedtime again. That's right, hot rickshaw Ben. The fates just didn't have us in the cards that weekend, ah well. I've moved on. And have possibley met someone else. Possibly. This new guy, who shall remain nameless for the time being, definitely has one of those faces you could see yourself making out with. Sober or drunk, which is always a plus! ;) So, after a stop at the lake Sunday we came home just in time to oooohhhhh and aaahhhhh at some fireworks. Came home started this blog and crashed before I could find the energy to finish. Good thing though because I started it sober and I just don't think I'm a fan of the sober blogging. I can guarantee that this would not have taken the turn it did if I'd have been sober. A funny turn.
Well, that's about it for now. As my life keeps progressing I will keep posting.

So a Priest Walks into a Bar and.....

Generally when I start a blog I will already have a title for it in mind but, seeing as how I have no idea where this one tonight is going I will wait to title it till the very end.
Last Sunday I believe was my last blog. Sunday afternoon my mom's cousin (so my 2nd cousin? I'm confused because we always called him "Uncle" John) Fr. John Rossiter passed away. Today was now the second funeral I've been to for a priest. With all the issues I have with religion and Catholism in general one thing I never took issue with was my two uncle's who were priests. The other was Fr. Robert Kocour who really was my great uncle. The media likes to really focus their attention on priests who do bad things. I agree with the sentiment that they should be called out for their horrendous behavior and I also do not think that the Church should protect these people. They are scum. The ones who do horrific things. However, I don't feel like the media does a very good job at showing how fantastic, and understanding, and relateable priests can be. When I read about the works of priest who has done something good or honorable or what have you, I feel like the reporter writes in a way that says, "Hey, look at me, I'm a reporter who finally found a decent priest to write about now someone should write about how great I am." To which I say, PPLLLLbBBBtTTT.
Fr. Kocour and Fr. Rossiter were two of the greatest men I knew and if you had ever met my father you know that's saying something. Both of these men dedicated themselves to making the world a better place. One went to Venezuela to do missionary work for years, and the other stayed in Topeka with an open door to anyone who needed it. I am not going to go on and on about these two men and their life stories. If you want to know more I'm sure Google could help you out. My point in bringing it up was simply that it seems like people are quick to think the worst about priests and maybe I would be one of those people also if I hadn't grown up knowing two of the best around. I am a better person for having known them.
Now all that mushy stuff aside I would also like to add that if you have never been to a funeral for a priest and one day you find yourself blessed enough to know a wonderful priest (or a nun/sister, I can only assume that there will be similarities but I can't confirm this on account of never having been to a funeral for a nun/sister.) that want to pay your respects to upon his departure from this plain, I offer you a few tips. 1) There will most likely be a plethora of living priests at the funeral and they will all be up in the first 3-5 pews in their proper garments. Keep a close eye on this section because you will most likely witness what I like to call, "synchronized priesting." Now before you start casting stones let me explain, there are certain gestures and handmovments, and so forth that go on during a mass. At a funeral you will see about 40-50 priests doing all these movements at the same time. It is awesome! And I'm not even trying to be an asshole. It's just fun to watch. 2) If you are lucky you will get a priest that really knows how to deliver a homily. If you don't know what that is the best way to explain it is to say that it is an anecdotal collection of stories that make you better understand the gospel reading (see Geri, I still know my stuff). Some priests really have a gift for homily's while others to put it nicely just do not. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. I don't remember the homily for Fr. Kocour's funeral but the one I heard today for Fr. John was pretty terrific. It had humor, it had a point, it didn't drag on and on and on, and the best part was that Uncle John actually had a say in what was said. He picked the priest and gave him a few pointers on how to deliver his final message. And again, while I am not a big believer in religion as a whole, I do like words a lot. I like it when someone is able to string words together in ways that really make you think or better yet challenge yourself. You don't have to have the same beliefs to come to the same conclusions or to know right from wrong.
Blah blah blah. I ment for that last section to be more funny than it was. I will say one irritating thing about priests though. There should be no hot priests. Yeah, I said it and I ment it. Just seems wasteful. Careful about casting those stones again. :)
I'm headed out of town for this 4th of July weekend but I promise to come back with some good stories. Hopefully they will be blog appropriete. Not that I think children read this but I'm sure I could get most of you to blush if I tried hard enough. Let's just say that this is my first weekend going to one of my favorite towns as a single woman in quite some time. Not that I'm gonna whore it up, but it's just nice to know the option is there! Have a great weekend and don't blow up any body parts!
P.S. I feel like I came up with an appropriete title for this blog after all!!!